Untitled Revisionist Western Project Brainstorms

Brainstorm for Chapter One:

Beat 1 (full beat) - The Dying Frontier: The reader sees that the "Old West" is being choked out by "Progress" (train tracks, lawyers, or fences). The myth is already rotting.

- “choke” - fences, super high fences everywhere?

            - the railroad is coming, which town will it go to?  The land is perfect (for the railroad) and equal to go to either town.

- town - normal western town? Some rich families, some dirtbag families, town is becoming established, a couple generations.

- two towns?  One “hippy town”, one “capitalist town”

Beat 2 (half beat) - The Drifter’s Burden: Introduce the protagonist. They aren't a hero; they are a survivor with a specific internal conflict or a sin they are trying to outrun.

- main character a white dude?  Lizard man?  Lizard lady?  Gay lizard lady?  Evil child?

- a person from hippy town is compelled to leave hippy town and go to capitalist town, because of their “sin”.  They misbehaved in hippy town and is shunned and driven to go to capitalist town and will try and stop the railroad from going to capitalist town. 

- We see a little flashback hinting at the “sin” - a bloody knife, their mom saying “How dare you, get out of my house/this town” or whatever.

- the protagonist is working to get the railroad to go to hippy town so that they can return to hippy town a hero later on; their “sin” will be forgiven if they can make this railroad thing happen for hippy town.  At least they think that is how it will go down.

Brainstorm for Chapter Two:

Beat 2 (half beat) - The Drifter’s Burden: Introduce the protagonist. They aren't a hero; they are a survivor with a specific internal conflict or a sin they are trying to outrun.

Beat 3 (full beat) - Crossing the Line: The characters enter a lawless "No Man’s Land" or a town controlled by a singular, corrupt force. They make a choice to stay for a reason that isn't purely "good" (money, revenge, or lack of options).

- we know her overall quest but when she gets to town maybe things instantly shift.

- does she go directly to town or to the shanty town between the two towns, where the railroad people are camped up.

        - talks to the railroad people, or overhears them, or finds a note.  She figures out what the railroad wants from a town for it to connect to it.  Therefore having a plan of what to sabotage in Blackridge to get the railroad to choose Eden's Drift.  

- Does Eden's Drift even want the railroad?  Would the railroad connecting to Eden's Drift destroy or weaken that town in some way, because it is so non-industrial?  Is her plan foolish and she can't see it because she doesn't understand the town and has always been an outsider even though she is from there?

- Her mother kicked her out, but does her dad (the stagecoach man) agree with this action?  It's possible at some point her dad comes to get her in Blackridge.

- As her dad is a stagecoach man, would the railroad coming to their town impact his job in a bad way? Or a good way, or whatnot?  Something to explore at some point maybe.

- Is there a sexy boy who rides shotgun in the stagecoach?  Will he be a love interest for Kiona, or the dad??? Or does he exist at all.

- In this universe, does a woman with a short hair cut mean something?  Is that why she cut her hair off?  

- She goes into Blackridge after finding out the info from the railroad men.  She finds a place to stay or eat?  Saloon?  General Store/Boarding house?

Brainstorm for Chapter Three

Beat 4 (full beat) - The Ominous Peace: A warning from a local or a chilling sight (a row of empty graves, a burnt-out homestead) that tells them the "law" here is lethal. They ignore it.

Beat 5 (half beat) - The Shaking of Hands: First contact with the antagonist. Instead of a shootout, it’s a tense dialogue or a display of "civilized" cruelty. The hero realizes this person can’t be dealt with using simple "frontier justice."

- Kiona sees in town (“chilling sight”) maybe:

  - people stapled to the wall, signs that say they didn’t pay their debts/bankrupt/didn’t hit their quotas for the q/called in sick???

    - maybe a hanging with a this person is poor sign.  Or any kind of killing.

    - Kiona enters town, sees a crowd or hears cheering and goes to see what it is and sees the hanging scaffold??  Lots of ads, sponsored by, etc.  bikini girl with sign, like a ring girl (to piss off Kiona even more??

    - maybe Kiona sees the banker at the hanging and confronts him, she is a rebel, etc.??? her blood is boiling, she can’t help herself.  Maybe although she was not a fit for Eden’s Drift, she still finds the capitalism of Blackridge to be gross, so some of Eden’s Drift’s morals are in her after all.  She’s just mouthy.  Hahaha. 

Warning from a local:

- maybe she runs into someone she used to know, someone from Eden’s Drift, who she was told was dead.  But when someone is ousted from Eden’s Drift, it is told around that town that they died, but maybe they didn’t, like what happened to her old friend (and what is likely happening to her own name in Eden’s Drift now???).

    - this emphasizing that Eden’s Drift is more of a façade.  Blackridge might be nasty and cruel, but it is more honest.

    - this friend she finds in the crowd around the hanging scaffold??  Friend can fill her in on some Blackridge lore?? Suggest a place for Kiona to stay, etc.

Antagonist maybe:

    - the banker/young banker/banker’s son (so she can seduce him?) maybe she can’t strike at the head of the snake, she has to strike at the tail/the main antagonist maybe the dad, but she can get to the dad via the son, or daughter, or wife?

    - maybe Kiona goes to the tavern/inn and is talking with the woman there, a young man comes in, Kiona finds out he is the son of the banker, the innwoman, the wife of the banker.  Now she has a target or two??

Kiona’s seduction plan:

- maybe she starts off wanting to seduce the son to get to the father, but then meets the wife, and she and the wife have actual chemistry with each other.  Maybe the wife is young and pretty, because the banker is an old rich man, so he has a pretty, young wife??

Brainstorm for Chapter Four

Beat 5 (half beat) - The Shaking of Hands: First contact with the antagonist. Instead of a shootout, it’s a tense dialogue or a display of "civilized" cruelty. The hero realizes this person can’t be dealt with using simple "frontier justice."

Beat 6 (full beat) - The Blood in the Dust: The first act of irrevocable violence. A side character dies or the hero is humiliated. The "rules" of the West have officially broken.

- are there more people in the stagecoach by the dais?  Is this stagecoach man of this stagecoach meaningful?  

- humiliation of Kiona might be the better choice, keep Elm around for a while yet

- Does Kiona rush the stage, risking the ire of the still gathered crowd?

- Elm explains that Santornio was her husband and by volunteering to jump in the hole their (her) debts are all forgiven.  Do they have kids?

- Kiona causes a ruckus with a guard or something and is given a fine she cannot pay, maybe she flashes her knife, maybe attacks someone.  nothing arrestable, just finable.  this is the "violence"??

- Does Elm go back to work or does she get the afternoon off because her husband was the willing?  Elm works at the bank (The Blackridge Vault and Trust), Kiona goes with her.  To exchange her money from Eden's Drift to Blackridge dollary-doos? She gets ripped off in the exchange and Kiona erupts in violence??  Gets the fines that way?  They see her knife when she dumps it out to find her ED dollary-doos, fine her for that.

- the banker's wife is there, sees Kiona's troubles, asks the guards to bring Kiona to her.  the wife offers to pay the fine, she can tell Kiona is not from Blackridge, because of her clothes, wife has some plan, or is just attracted to Kiona.

- OR On the way to the bank, some men come and harass her, Kiona explodes into violence and she gets in trouble that way??

- OR Kiona jumps into the pit and finds the monster inside, rescues Sarbonio?? Kills the monster??  She gets into trouble that way.  The monster is central to their city.  The bankers son or wife gets Kiona out of the pit and into their clutches??  Elm's debts are not paid off if Sarbonio survives??